SOME PEOPLE ARE SO RUDE

Some people are so rude, have you ever noticed? For instance, recently I ran into this woman I barely knew in the grocery store. Of course, I wanted to be polite, my mother had raised me well, so I asked her, just in passing mind you, how she was doing. I was somewhat stunned as she actually proceeded to tell me.

She told me about the trouble her son had gotten into and how it had put a strain on her already shaky relationship with her husband. They were always arguing, she said, mostly about money and on top of that her youngest had gotten sick and now they had doctor bills to pay and with their finances already stretched to the limit, she didn’t know how they were going to make it. She went on about how she was at her wit’s end. How she didn’t know where to turn and how she just didn’t know what she was going to do if things didn’t get better soon.

I kept looking off, checking my watch, edging a little further away, hoping she would get the hint that I was in a hurry and didn’t have time for her entire life story, but she just went on and on. Finally, just when I was sure she would never get the hint, she said, “Listen, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have bothered you with my troubles. I just had to tell somebody.”

I mumbled something about it ‘being alright’ and how I 'understood' that sometimes you just had to 'let those things out’, all the while thinking to myself it must be my ‘lucky’ day. Anyway, I grabbed the opportunity to excuse myself and took off as fast as I could to finish my shopping, glancing up each aisle as I went to make sure she wasn’t around the next corner.

Really, of all the nerve, didn’t this woman know I had problems of my own, not the least of which was trying to make up for the time I’d lost listening to her? What ever happened to the age-old tradition of suffering in silence? Didn’t she have any manners at all? What made her think it mattered to me anyway? What did she expect me to do about it? Didn’t she have family or friends she could unload on? Why me? When I got back to the car, I breathed a sigh of relief, all the while making a mental note to keep an eye out for her car the next time I pulled into the parking lot.

The following Sunday our pastor’s sermon was on bearing one another's burdens. I felt a prick at my conscience as the memory of the woman in the grocery store flashed into my mind, then I thought better of it. Surely, that’s not what the Lord meant. He knew I had been in a hurry that day, surely He understood. Anyway the woman had all the classic signs of becoming a nuisance and my life was complicated enough as it was. Besides, I reasoned, when I told the Lord I was willing to be His hands and feet, I meant things like going to church or writing an occasional check. Perhaps even donating food and clothes to the missions, sending a sympathy card, or inviting someone to church. Saying things like, ‘I’m sorry,’ or ‘I’ll be praying for you.’ Anything beyond that would take a level of commitment I wasn’t sure I wanted to make and surely God didn’t expect more than that.

It would make such demands on my time, if I took the time to listen, I might actually be called on to get involved in other peoples daily lives. Surely when the Lord called me, He didn’t expect that of me. I have schedules to meet, things I ‘have’ to do, things I ‘want’ to do. I have my own family to take care for. I don’t have time to get involved in other peoples lives. I’ve got my own set of problems.

Sometimes it takes a while for the Lord to drive a point home with me, but I think I have finally gotten the message on this one. Jesus never turned a deaf ear to those who cried out to Him. Yet here was this person who had cried out to me for help and I hadn’t felt the least bit of compassion for her. All I could think of was myself. I hadn’t witnessed to her about the love of God. I hadn’t offer to pray with her, or for her. Instead, I was angered that she had dared to make demands on my time, forgetting that the Lord had placed her there for just such a reason and I had blown it. The Lord calls us to be a friend to the friendless, but I had not been her friend, or even her neighbor. I had been nowhere close to being a good Samaritan.

Yes, the Lord drove home a message in my heart that day. Did I learn from it? Yes. Have I always lived up to what I learned that day? No. I still have a long way to go. What did I learn? I learned that it’s one thing to talk about the love of God and quite another to show it. I learned that it’s one thing to talk about His compassion and quite another to offer compassion and comfort and assurance to someone when they are hurting. I learned what it meant to offer a “cup of cold water, in my Name.”

I look at the world around me and see so many hurting people in the world now. Lonely people who desperately need someone they can call a friend. People who feel they have to be strong for their family’s sake, but who sometimes need someone be strong for them, even if just for a few minutes. People who feel they have no one they can turn to and just need to borrow a shoulder. Most of the time it only takes a minute to give them what they need. Sometimes it takes longer. Sometimes they just need a hug or an encouraging word. Occasionally there are those who need more than just emotional support. They need real physical or financial help. Still others need spiritual assistance. There are people who don’t know the Lord and need to. People in all stages of their walk with Him who need encouragement, for one to come along side and get up under the burden with them. To give them a moment of rest.

What had I been thinking that day? Of course we’re called to share one another’s burdens. Isn’t that what we’re here for? To be the Lord’s eyes, to see the hurting world around us? To be the Lord’s hands, to hold the hand of one who is hurting or needs someone to lift them up? To be the arm He puts around the shoulder of one who is suffering. Isn’t that one of the major ways He shows His love to the world, through us.

Jesus fed those who were hungry, spiritually and physically. He healed those who were sick, spiritually and physically. He didn’t just preach the Good News, He lived it. He didn’t just say a few nice words and offer to pray for people and then walk away. He rolled up His shirt sleeves and got involved. He didn’t just talk about loving one another, He did it. He loved them all, even his enemies.

People aren’t won to Christ merely by words, they are won by those who live out the Gospel in a hurting world, by those who take the time to get personally involved. They are won to Christ by those who take the time out of their busy schedules to say, “yes, I am busy, I do have problems of my own, but people are more important than agendas. The dishes will wait, supper can be a few minutes late, if you’re hurting, let’s talk. If your lonesome, come over. If I don’t have time, I’ll make time." Believe me, I know there are some things in our lives that can’t wait. I know there are things that we must attend to at any given moment in time. I’m not unrealistic.

Look though, if you will, at the life of Mother Theresa. How many lives must that dear woman have touched for the Lord’s sake? Not because she talked about ‘feeling their pain’, but because she cared enough to get personally involved in their lives. She lived among them. She shared in their sufferings, as well as their joys. She knew she could not save the world, but she did her best to save her part of it.

It may mean forgoing that night on the town, it may mean passing up that day to lunch with the girls, you may have to take that twenty dollars you were going to spend on a new shirt or pair of pants to help pay someone’s water bill. You may even be called on to help hang a picture, or mow a lawn. Instead of standing back and shaking your head in disgust because the guy next door is a ‘lazy bum’. I firmly believe that the Lord places people like that in our path in order to see what we will do and one day He will ask us to answer for our response. We need to open our eyes and look for ways to care for those around us. Not just because it’s a nice thing to do. But for His sake, for His glory and for His Name's sake.

We are called to reach out for the lost. We are called to share one another’s burdens. We are called to be our brother’s keeper and those things take time. Much more than just a casual, ‘hi, how you doing', or 'God speed'. Allowing people into your life and your heart is risky and time consuming, but isn’t that what Jesus would have done? Isn’t that what we are here for, to help others establish a relationship with the God who loves us, the God we have not seen, by establishing a relationship with those we have seen.

I don’t mean to point fingers, if I did I most of them would be pointing back at me. I don’t dare think for a minute that I’ve got this thing licked, I haven’t, but that weekend changed me. I just want to share with you what I have learned and like so many others, I learn best from my mistakes. May God forgive me where I’ve failed.

We, the church, need to be actively looking for those around us who need help and think of it as an opportunity to serve Christ. An opportunity to win people to God. Isn’t that what Jesus did? Isn’t that what He calls us to? I can’t remember who said it first, but there is an old saying that goes something like this, ‘Preach the gospel at all times, use words if you must.’ © 1998 Rachel Whelan